xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
