Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
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