I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
