i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
You are a genius and a whore.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize