If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
high people should be assigned attendants
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
