My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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