Yo dont text me then not text me
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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