How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize