I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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