you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
