We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize