We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
