Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
