Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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