yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
