So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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