I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
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