hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
