Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
