so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
