I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
