What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
