escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
