and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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