hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
she smelled like a LAN party
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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