Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
