problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
