Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
