I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
