what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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