Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
It's just like the Real World with babies
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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