No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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