Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
