we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
