Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
