i need an iv and a liver transplant
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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