Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I think your dad took our porno
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
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