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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night

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• (760): View more from California

  I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?

  (281): View more from Texas

  If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!

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• (716): View more from New York

  Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."

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• (760): View more from California

  We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men

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• (425): View more from Washington

  she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours

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