I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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