would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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