So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
