I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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