We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
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