As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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