I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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