a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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