So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
