worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
