My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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