The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
